Cereal Is Important

CerealIsImportantThe little marshmallows in his cereal made Chuck smile. They were childish and not particularly nutritious, sure, but they were delicious and the high point of most of his days.

“So, do you think you can get to that today?” his wife repeated.

“Sure,” he said between bites. He hadn’t been listening, he had been trying to enjoy his cereal.

“Can we take care of them right now, then?”

He looked up and she was doing that thing where she put her hands on her hips and all her weight on one foot. If chuck were to try to capture the look of judgmental impatience in a statue, he would carve it in that shape. It would be a waste of time, though, because nobody wants that in their home.

“Honey, they can wait, I’m eating me lucky charms.”

She was not amused.

“Charles, this is important,” she said, the weight shifting to her other foot.

Chuck sort of wished he had been paying attention now, but only sort of. “Of course it is.”

“Oh, really? Charles, you don’t seem to be acting like they are very important.” She was really mad. She only called him Charles when she was angry, and here she had done it in two statements in a row.

“Of course they are, but I’m eating my cereal. They can wait until I’m done.”

“You don’t even know what we’re talking about, do you?” She was on to him.

“Sure, I do,” he lied.

“Okay, if you were to rank THEM by priority, where would you put them, then?”

He thought for a moment. He was in real trouble here, but decided that he couldn’t make it much worse. “Well, I can tell you this much, they’re after me lucky charms!”

She left him that day, but at least when he told this story to their divorce attorney, he got a chuckle.